Raw and unfiltered

How do you react when someone puts you down?

 

Today, very unexpectedly, I was insulted – this instance included words, expressions and dismissal.

 

How I felt and thought during the first 5 minutes

I felt rage surging over me and tears flooding in. 

If these emotions had a color, there would be a bright blood red cloud hovering all around me.

I felt like foul mouthing the person and even punching them for a second.

I felt like they should be taught a lesson for being rude, mean and insulting.

I wanted to be the one teaching them that lesson.

I wanted to see them suffer for causing me pain.

I wanted them to know how it felt to be insulted, to be treated that way.

 

What I told myself after 5 minutes

How I feel, is in my control.

I have to calm down.

What they say or think has NOTHING to do with me.

Their behavior and words are a result of THEIR stuff, NOT mine.

I have to deal with my feelings and emotions and see them as they are – raw and clear.

I have to work through my own reactions and thought processes and resolve them in a healthy way.

Causing others harm or verbally abusing them (even if in my head) won’t do any good to me.

It will just lead to more harm for them AND me.

I am causing pain to myself by holding on to these emotions, thoughts and reactions.

The reactions are just a result of this surge of emotions.

I may not be able to control the uprising of the emotions but I can control and decide how long or if at all I want to hold on to those emotions.

I have to let go.

That’s the only option if I want to be at peace.

And I do.

I let go.


What do you do when you face a similar situation?

Do you lash out or process through your thoughts and feelings? 

Comment below to let me know or send me a tweet


Featured artist: Paolo Troilo

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20 comments

  1. Wow, a powerful piece. The hurt and anger are almost palpable. I’m not sure how I would react now that I am older, but I know that when I was younger the injustice of such behaviour would consume me and I would believe that what they said was untrue so why would they act like that and why did no-one come to my defence? I would feel isolated and would withdraw into myself. It would fester for a very long time. I would never have anything to do with that person again. Yours is a very mature, intelligent reaction and I applaud you ☺️👏🏻

    Liked by 1 person

    1. timelesswheel · ·

      The anger part lasted maybe 5 minutes but it felt like a lot more and drained a lot of my energy. We don’t often realise how much energy prolonging anger, resentment and negativity take up. These emotions will come up and there’s no point running away or ignoring them… but there’s no point fanning it either. When I read the post again, I cringed as well. It made me uneasy. But it was real. I’m consciously making efforts to overcome some of my tendencies that aren’t doing me any good. I feel isolated and withdrawn too. But because I’ve been exposed to the right situations and sources that have taught me so much all these years and actually in less than a year, I’m able to at least approach it this way…I paused for a second to ponder upon whether I should really post it…Thank you so much for taking the time to post this meaningful comment ☺

      Liked by 1 person

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